Tag: connection

  • Why Gathering Matters

    Why Gathering Matters

    It’s been almost 3 weeks now since our annual conference, and I’ve found myself thinking about it quite a lot.

    Not so much about the event itself, or whether every session went exactly as planned, but about some of the feedback we’ve received since.

    People have talked about the speakers, the discussions, the ideas and the things they’ve learned. But what I’ve also picked up on is how many people have talked about just being together.

    It reminded me of something I’ve talked about before, and a book I read called The Art of Gathering.

    Why do we gather?

    And what is it that people actually get from being in a room together?

    More than an event

    When you work in a space like ours, the work can be incredibly rewarding, but it can also be pretty tough going.

    We’re dealing with issues that are deeply human. There is grief, frustration, anger, hope and sometimes a real sense of helplessness.

    As well as people most affected by this, people working across the drugs field see the impact of drug-related harms in their communities every day. They see people struggling. They see people dying. They see the gaps in services, the consequences of poverty and inequality, and the things that aren’t working as they should.

    And it can be exhausting.

    Before our conference this year, a number of people told us they were feeling burned out. They were struggling with the sheer amount of harm they were seeing around them and the demands of trying to respond to it.

    So when people then tell us that they left the conference feeling inspired, energised, with new ideas and new connections, I think that’s really significant.

    That has to be one of the core reasons we gather.

    Not just to learn, to hear from experts, or to exchange information.

    But to remind ourselves that we’re not doing this alone.

    The power of being together

    There is absolutely a place for conferences where people move between different workshops and sessions depending on their particular interests.

    They’re so useful. They allow you to cover more topics and give people the opportunity to choose what is most relevant to them.

    But over the last few years, I’ve increasingly recognised the value of doing something slightly different.

    Our main conference takes place in one room across two full days.

    People hear many of the same things. They listen to the same speakers. They experience the same moments. They hear the same questions and conversations.

    And I think there is something really powerful about that.

    You start to feel part of a collective.

    You’re not just attending a conference… you’re part of something much bigger.

    There’s a sense that we’re all in this together.

    And I think that’s particularly important when you work in an environment that can sometimes feel incredibly divisive.

    We don’t all think the same or agree on the best solutions.

    We certainly don’t always agree on policy.

    But we can share values.

    We can share a desire to reduce harm, improve people’s lives and create something better.

    And sometimes being surrounded by people who understand that without you having to explain it can be hugely restorative.

    Creating shared ownership

    One of the changes we’ve made to our conference over the last few years has been introducing an exhibition space.

    It might seem like a relatively small thing, but I think it has made a real difference.

    It helps make the conference feel less like our event and much more like everyone’s event.

    Organisations and groups can have a presence. People can meet each other outside the formal programme. Conversations happen that we could never have planned into an agenda.

    We’ve also made a conscious effort to have lots of different people chairing sessions and contributing throughout the event.

    That’s really important to me.

    If we’re talking about bringing people together, then the space needs to feel like it belongs to the people who are in it.

    And that leads me on to something else that I think is fundamental.

    Who gets to be in the room

    For me, there is no meaningful conversation about drugs policy, practice or drug-related harm without the voices of people who are actually experiencing those issues.

    That isn’t a tokenistic position.

    It’s a fundamental part of how I believe organisations should work.

    Our values are clear about the importance of involving people with lived and living experience. But for me, values aren’t really values if they only appear on a website or in a strategy document.

    They have to show up in what we actually do.

    They have to influence who gets invited.

    Who gets heard.

    Who gets to shape the conversation.

    Who gets to challenge our thinking.

    And ultimately, who gets to influence the solutions.

    People who are experiencing the issues we’re trying to solve are often closest to understanding what needs to change.

    That doesn’t mean they have all the answers.

    It doesn’t mean their experience is the same as everyone else’s.

    And it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t bring together people with different expertise and perspectives.

    It means we need to create enough space for those voices to genuinely influence what happens next.

    That’s why, for example, the Advocates for Change event that my colleagues organise the day before our conference is so important to me.

    It’s why I seek sponsorship that enables people with lived and living experience and families to attend our conference.

    And it’s why I want those voices throughout the event, rather than confined to one particular session or labelled as the ‘lived experience’ contribution.

    I believe that’s what living your values looks like.

    Making space to think

    There is another connection I’ve been thinking about too.

    One of the things I value most about coaching is the creation of space.

    Space to stop. To think.

    Space to hear yourself actually think when everything around you feels noisy.

    And I think gathering can create something similar.

    We spend so much of our working lives moving from one thing to the next. Emails, meetings, deadlines, crises, decisions, problems that need solving.

    Particularly in a sector where there is always another urgent issue, it can be difficult to step back and think about the bigger picture.

    Gathering creates a reason to pause.

    You hear something that makes you think differently.

    Someone says something that challenges an assumption you’ve been carrying around.

    You have a conversation with someone you’ve never met before.

    You reconnect with somebody you haven’t seen for ages.

    You realise someone else is dealing with exactly the same challenge you are.

    And sometimes you just remember why you do the work in the first place.

    That’s not insignificant.

    What we take away

    Of course, we want people to leave our conference with new knowledge.

    We want them to have learned something.

    We want ideas to turn into action.

    But I think what people take away is sometimes much less tangible than that.

    They take away a feeling.

    A renewed sense of purpose.

    A connection.

    A conversation.

    A new idea.

    A reminder that they are not alone.

    Maybe even a little bit of energy to take back into what can sometimes be incredibly difficult work.

    And maybe that’s why gathering matters.

    Because sometimes we don’t need another solution.

    Sometimes we need somewhere to put down the weight we’re carrying for a little while, be around people who understand it, and pick it back up again with our batteries recharged and a little more energy.

    And then we learn from it

    There is one final part of gathering that I think is important.

    After every event, we look carefully at the feedback.

    We bring the events team together and talk honestly about what worked, what didn’t, what could have been better and what we should do differently next time.

    There is no blame attached to that conversation.

    Things will inevitably go wrong.

    Something won’t work quite as we’d hoped.

    A session might run over.

    A practical detail might be missed.

    That’s not failure.

    It’s learning.

    I think that’s important in leadership too.

    Creating a space where people can be honest about what happened, without immediately looking for someone to blame, gives us a much better chance of improving.

    The conference isn’t perfect.

    It doesn’t need to be.

    What matters to me is that we keep listening, keep learning and keep trying to create something that reflects our values and gives people what they need.

    We need each other

    I think one of the biggest things I’ve been reminded of from this year’s conference is that gathering is about much more than bringing people into the same physical space.

    It’s about connection.

    It’s about belonging.

    It’s about creating opportunities for people to feel part of something bigger than themselves.

    It’s about making space for different voices, particularly those closest to the issues we’re trying to change.

    And it’s about giving people the opportunity to stop, reflect, recharge and reconnect with why the work matters.

    Maybe that’s why, despite all the technology we have available to us, I still think there is something really special about being in a room together.

    You can’t recreate that connection online in the same way.

    Sometimes you just need to be there.

    And maybe that’s the point.

    We need each other.

    Especially when the work is hard.

    Especially when the issues are complex.

    And especially when we are trying to create change in a space where there isn’t always agreement about how we get there.

    Gathering reminds us that although we may not have all the answers, we don’t have to figure it all out on our own.

    If this resonated with you…

    If you’re leading in a complex or demanding environment and finding it difficult to create the space to stop, think and reconnect with what matters, coaching can provide that space.

    Whether you’re navigating a particular leadership challenge, thinking about how you bring people with you, or simply need a confidential place to step back from the noise, I’d love to explore whether coaching could be useful for you.

    You can find out more about my coaching and book a complimentary chat here.

  • Lifting Others as We Rise: Reflections on Leadership, Influence, and Staying True to Your Values

    Lifting Others as We Rise: Reflections on Leadership, Influence, and Staying True to Your Values

    I was recently invited to speak on a panel at the Women of Influence Forum 2026 that had the theme of ‘Lifting Others as We Rise’ – an experience that gave me both time to reflect and a renewed sense of responsibility.

    Spaces like this matter. They create room for honest conversations about leadership, ambition, doubt, and the realities many women navigate as they progress in their careers. They remind us that leadership doesn’t happen in isolation – and that who we see, support, and learn from along the way really counts.

    The Women of Influence Network itself is something really special. Founded by two amazing women (Julie and Ceilidh) leading in the Cabinet Office, it’s growing from strength to strength and creating a space for women in government to connect, support one another, and develop as leaders. I feel very lucky to be part of it – not just as a speaker on the panel, but as a mentor within the programme. I’ve already had the privilege of mentoring one woman and look forward to continuing to support others.

    What’s particularly meaningful for me is how this all came about – through connections. I first met Julie through Charity Leadership Scotland, where she is a mentor on the ‘First Year in Post’ programme (another great resource for CEOs). Her support during that time, and since, has been invaluable – not just to me personally, but also to my team, who she later supported on a development day. And it was through that relationship that I was invited into this network. It’s a powerful reminder that connections matter – they open doors, create opportunities, and often lead you somewhere you never expected.

    Our panel was titled ‘Leading out Loud: Authenticity, Vulnerability and Shared Success’ and the first question we were asked was:

    “Have any of you ever had a ‘gate’ opened for you by another woman that changed your trajectory?”

    What struck me was how others struggled to answer that.

    I found that quite worrying.

    Because for me, there has always been someone.

    The Power of Being Seen Early

    Early in my career, working in a drug treatment service, I had a manager called Tracy.

    She saw something in me before I fully saw it in myself. She gave me opportunities – real ones. I led on our local naloxone programme, was encouraged to stretch beyond my comfort zone, and stepped into her role on an acting basis when she moved on. She didn’t just delegate – she invested. She mentored me, challenged me, and backed me.

    And that was really empowering.

    There have been many women in my life who have supported and influenced me since – but Tracy represents something really pivotal: that early moment where someone opens a door and says, you can do this – get on with it.

    It made me reflect on how important it is that more women have that experience. That we don’t leave people searching for role models – but actively become them.

    From “Helping People” to Leading People

    I’ve always wanted to help people.

    That’s been the thread through everything I’ve done – from mental health nursing, to working with people who use drugs, to now leading a drugs policy charity.

    But helping changes shape as you move into leadership.

    Early on, it was direct, one-to-one support. Now, it’s about creating the conditions where others can do their best work – where they can grow, feel supported, and ultimately make a difference themselves. That shift – from doing to enabling – has been one of the biggest learning curves in my leadership journey.

    Learning (and Unlearning) Leadership

    At times I think back to an early appraisal I had maybe a year or so after qualifying as a mental health nurse.

    I was described as autocratic. (Yes Philip, I’m talking about you. Ha!)

    When I think about that, I can only imagine what people’s experience of me must have been like.

    At the time, it was probably a reflection of how strongly I felt about the work. I’ve always had a deep sense of responsibility to the people we serve – and a belief that poor practice, stigma, or discrimination should be challenged.

    I still believe that.

    I often come back to the phrase: “what you permit, you promote.”

    Because in the environments I’ve worked in – particularly with people who use drugs – staying silent in the face of stigma or poor treatment doesn’t sit right with me. It feels like agreement.

    In these moments there’s a little voice in my mind asking me things like:

    • What would people who use drugs think if I stayed quiet right now?
    • What would their family think of the care they’re receiving?

    That sense of accountability has driven me to speak up.

    But what I’ve learned over time is that how you speak up matters just as much as whether you do.

    Courage and Compassion: Both Are Needed

    If I’m honest, I haven’t always got that balance right.

    There have been times where passion has come across as harshness. Where my intent – to challenge, to protect, to advocate – has been right, but my delivery hasn’t brought people with me.

    And that’s the shift in my leadership over the years. Well, my intention anyway – I don’t get it right all the time.

    But, at least in my mindset, I’ve moved from feeling that I have to call things out to recognising the importance of bringing people along.

    Because real, lasting change doesn’t happen when people feel shut down – it happens when they feel able to reflect, understand, and do better.

    So when I was asked what I’d tell my younger self on her first day on the nursing ward, my answer was something along these lines:

    Stay true to your values.
    Speak up when something doesn’t feel right.
    But remember – how you do that matters.
    Be brave enough to challenge, and thoughtful enough to bring people with you.

    Lifting Others as We Rise – And Letting Ourselves Be Lifted

    The theme throughout the day was “lifting others as you rise.”

    For me, that shows up in coaching, mentoring, and creating opportunities for others – just as Tracy did for me.

    It also features in how I lead day to day.

    Wellbeing isn’t a side conversation – it’s central. Because the work we do is complex and often emotionally heavy, and if we want people to sustain their impact, we have to support them properly.

    I’ve learned that:

    • Caring deeply doesn’t mean carrying everything
    • Boundaries are essential, not optional
    • And leadership is as much about who you support as who you become

    Final Reflection

    I left the event feeling really inspired and with a few main thoughts:

    We need more visible examples of women supporting women.
    More people willing to open doors.
    More leaders willing to be both courageous and compassionate.

    And perhaps most importantly – we need to remember that influence isn’t always about position.

    Sometimes, it’s about being the person who sees potential and creates opportunities to step up.

    As I continue this journey – now as a CEO, but still someone who fundamentally just wants to help – I carry that with me.

    Because leadership, at its best, is simply helping at scale.

    And making sure you’re not the only one rising.